Self expression

Anxieties with the C Bomb

30/03/2020

Hey everyone, I hope you are all keeping safe.

Todays post will be a little natter. If anything i need to write down my current head space because I like the the rest of you, need to vent about all the current anxieties in the world at the minute around the virus c bomb.

One thing that’s really on my mind with this whole thing, is spending all this time alone. I live on my own and although have the company of my little pooch, I have spent my entire life trying to keep busy. When I lived with my parents, because of how the situation was there, I made sure I kept myself busy so I didn’t have to deal with home life, and since moving out its been a habit I have maintained. Living on your own means there is no one there to tell you to stop or to bring you back down when your flying off too much. Now we’re in total lockdown, the thought of spending all this time with just myself absolutely terrifies me because if I spend too much time with my brain I spiral and all the old dark thoughts rise again. Just can’t handle it. I am my own worst enemy. Theres only so much animal crossing one girl can play.

One thing to remember though is that we are all safe. We do have warm homes with electric and gas and hot water and that I am greatful for. I can still go food shopping and walk the dog and go for a run, plus technology now is so much better than five years ago even. If this had all happened a few years back there would be no facetime and all these apps to help keep us connected. that I am greatful for.

Plus I am swamped with things to do at the minute including blogging, Animal crossing, Disney plus and running, so in all fairness for the first week or so I have been keeping busy. It’s just hard knowing you want to see everyone and you can’t.

I hope everyone is doing okay. You may not be at 100% right now but its the first week and we’ve completed it. Even if you are feeling low, you are still doing your bit and that’s what we all need to do in order to get past these next few months. I might have to start training my alcohol intolerance for the absolute sesh that is going to take place after this is all over.

Sending lots of love and hugs,

Chin up and one day at a time,

Sophiemagsx

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